''I WAS SAD AND AND ANGRY FROM A VERY YOUNG AGE''

"As much as it was always a part of me, it felt foreign. I was sad and angry from a very young age. There was a nasty toxicity inside me that would never settle or filter out. I didn't know why I had it and I couldn't release it...''''...for some, mental illness doesn’t have a trigger. It merely exists, inside your body, beneath your skin and bones. It is there, demanding to be felt and refusing to be forgotten. It is a darkness that shotguns the front seat. Some days it sits silent, with dormant eyes observing your decisions. Other days it speaks with full volume, taking hold of the wheel. You feel every swerve, every jolt, every debilitating movement, but you are powerless. Needing to cry, shed, refresh but not being able to release one single tear. Drowning internally with emotion while experiencing a severe emotional drought at the same time.

 I am happy to say that today, we are at peace. I understand it. Most of the time I can catch it just before it stems into anything too unmanageable. That's the key: understanding yourself. Learning what might aggravate it and what can alleviate it. It's a strange experience, losing yourself. Unraveling right down to that very first cell. Losing yourself to the point where your life purpose becomes finding yourself. But I guess isn't that everyone's purpose, regardless of their mental (in)stability? It might sound terribly odd but I am glad that I have experienced this mental adversity. Struggle allows you to feel things on a deeper level.” - Tylar, 24, Australia

Post credit: The Lives of Others